Online Relationships: Do they work?

[Hopeless Heartless]

Hey all (Mod's if there is already a topic like this, feel free to lock it. It's just I searched "Online" and got 975 pages of results. Not nice :P)


I was wondering how you guys felt about internet relationships. This topic has been on my mind for quite sometime, so I thought "I may as well see what other people have to say."


Myself, personally, I don't believe in them. I think you really have to meet someone special to get into a relationship, and not via a computer screen. I mean, you'd never know what the person actually looked like (pictures can only show too much), you could never hold them, or play with their hair, anything like that. The whole thing seems a bit sterile to me, that's all.


I'm not knocking those who are involved in them though, I just don't really see the point in them, that's all.


I VALUE YOUR OPINIONS :)
So spill!

[dreadhead20]

i agree with you. its really not the same anymore. times have changed. people are lying on their picture saying that look like janet jackson when they look like freedy crouger (i aint lying some people do). and when you want to snuggle, you cant because your lova is around the US or around the world (wherever that may be).

[The Real keyblade Master]

I agree

It's all compliments and saying "I love you". But there is no "Love" because sometimes one or both of the people in the relationship have never experienced a relationship before.

It's a idea for the desperate.

[Helix: The True Hero]

I once thought that Internet relationships could work just fine. However, the chances of you actually meeting the person you've fallen for are incredibly slim. And also, on the Internet you have the chance to veil your image from what you really are in real life. You can do all these things to make you seem like the coolest person in the world and all the people want to be like, but if they ever do get a chance to meet him/her, a lot of the time that person turns out to be a prick or extremely boring. On the Internet, you can make yourself anything you want to be.

On the topic of relationships: Do you really know and understand the person you're dating online? Is that person using any veils to make you think he/she's "da bawmb?" *Shakes head.*

(And HH: Play with their hair? XD)

[HappyHeartless]

Yeaah don't really believe in them. Mainly because I tried it once a few years back, and she didn't even leave that far away, and I met her in person once or twice, but it didn't work out. Maybe if we had met a few years later when we could actually meet eachother more often : p

[4thkeybladeholder]

Hey!
Used to.
Now I don't.
Goodbye.

Meh, I don't believe in them. They've said everything I think about it above, so I don't really need to explain myself.

[NicoleChristine]

Do they work?

Possibly different for each person. I know a couple, and American and someone who lived in Ireland, met online and got married. So it worked for them.

[UltimaxWeapon]

Well, some people might feel that an online relationship is an easy way to get a GF/BF, and then they don't have to worry about getting one in real life. But I think they're just a dumb excuse for getting a real BF/GF. You got to think, they might be all about love online, but what if they actually did meet that person in real life? Would they be the same as they are online, or would be to scared to even acknolage them. Ana the odds of actually meeting the person in real life are like, 1,000,000 to 1. Like RKM said, having an online realationship is a sign of being desperate.

[ForgottenMemory]

If two people are completely commited and are searching for a partner, I could see it work. But, you see, most of us here are teenagers and even younger. Like Helix said: The chances of meeting are very deplorable. And most of us are young - why be serious?
I've even discovered that it's difficult to build friendships here. But in that case, I have. And I have meet some great people in that sense.
Call me old fashioned, but online dating isn't for me.

[shadowlink]

Tbh, opinions of it vary a lot. Really, the best way is to have actually experienced both sides. I mean, i've been in an online relationship, and well.. It just finished like... 5 days ago 0_o.. But tbh, i don't want to have it again. Yes, you can get very emotionally attached to that person and "fall in love" with them, but usually it's that very reason that hurts you most. Once a connection or built you want to see them more and more, and when you face the reality that you can't, or won't for a long while, it hurts. I know it does. I mean, we saw each other once, and admittingly that one time was pretty damn amazing, but once it's over, it's just waiting again.

So really i'm not sure. It depends what kind of person you are really, but overall i think it's probably not the best idea to go down those routes. But that's just my opinion, and obviously some people will disagree, and i respect that XD.

[Togo]

i have never been in an online relationship but i dont think they work to be honest.Why cant it be like the good old days when you could just go in a bar and start to talk to someone.

[-RikuKH3]

I agree

It's all compliments and saying "I love you". But there is no "Love" because sometimes one or both of the people in the relationship have never experienced a relationship before.

It's a idea for the desperate.

Agreed. I think its pretty silly to be honest. You may talk to the person with a keyboard, but theres no real connection there. Thats pretty much all it is...talking. Things are completely different when you meat someone face to face, and you cant get that real connection with someone just from talking over a computer.

[Misuzu]

I'm not into it really, because yeah, you could talk to a person and then see a pic of them...whatever. But some people can just use someone else's pic and say its theirs, then they might be a stalker or whatever. I dunno, I just think its better to know them in real life better then taking a risk of thinking this person is who they say they are. Its better to get to know them in person, because then you could get as close as you want and actually pysically hug, or interact...blaaah...(not that way..lol) instead of being apart and only having computer communication. I dunno. I just like actually knowing the person instead of believing who they say they are. Some people its fine for them, good for you peeps, but for me, bleh. And especially with whats going on in today's society, you never know who people are or what they say they are. I dont want to be the next girl in the paper that got "kidnapped" or "cyber-bullied" or whatever...so on, so on, blaah. So thats what I think! *reads over* whoa that was long. ;)

[Aiyuuji]

I'm not for online relationships, I know a few people who have had them and all has been well they have met and got on like a house on fire. I just need to 'touch' and actually be with them i would feel alone otherwise.
Also you never know what kind of person your meeting i met a friend i had known for years and thought i liked him that way turned out he was a serious idiot (i would have liked to of said something nasty then but i wont) Turns out by going to meet him i met my boyfriend who 'was' one of his friends so all isnt so bad :D

[DragoonKain]

Do you not feel a connection for a character when you read a book or watch a movie? Who really cares if the other person isn't who you think they are? In an online relationship what matters is what you see and feel at the time. I think if you enter an online relationship looking for your next husband, you're heading down a bumpy road.

If you're entering an online relationship looking for something more along the lines of a companion, you might not be in all that much trouble. I for one, at times, have trouble expressing myself in a physical relationship. Online relationships I find... are just easier. I don't communicate well with somebody in person, but online I'm more comfortable. Also, I think online relationships are far more deeply personal. You aren't able to fill in blocks of silence with touching her hair, or taking out frustrations by having sex. You're forced to work through everything with sheer emotion and communication becuase communication is all you have. When it comes to relationships, the online version is by far the most mentally draining.

That being said I typically stray away from online relationships. The mentally draining part is one aspect I try to avoid. In addition, online relationships rarely carry over to real life. That's not to say I would never do one again, but if I was going to it would be for the enjoyment of that relationship and without the expectation that it would ever turn real. Perhaps that's the best way to make an online relationship work: don't actually expect it to work.

[mysteryRoxas]

i think it depends. sometimes they work out, but other times, they dont. especially, if one person is being completely honest, and the other is telling lies from the start.

[cbchick]

i think it really depends on the person themselves. i kno a lot of people who were in an online relationship and it works fine for them. As most of ya'll kno, i'm in an online relationship right now and we're fine. yea i kno the bad things about it and all that junk but there are some good things to come out of it. i'm not desperate or anything, its jus the way i am. at first i didn't like online relationships at all but like..after i tried it out, it didn't seem bad. idk its jus my opinion and stuff. i don't have a problem with it. >.>

[Wzrdto25]

Only Guys would say it doesn't work because they've never tried it. I haven't tried it but I know friends who make it work. It doesn't matter about the physical crap, because you have a real connection and waiting on the physical is a test of your true love. It's like abstinence, if you wait long enough it'll be special. If you blow it with every person you're with, you're simply a slut. If you use physical pleasure on a person that makes you the same. The fact that you can enjoy each others company without your tongue down their throat doesn't mean it's not love. Love is a feeling you can share with anyone. So before you say it's for the desperate, it's not really love, Shut It because you're not happy with your own lives and your own physical relationships. That's why they have online dating websites you Nerds.

[Naminette]

Don't really believe in it (anymore XD)

Got hurt once and that opened my eyes :/

[KHlover07]

Hhhhmmmm....well my opinion on the whole thing is kind of in the middle at the moment. I used to think the whole idea of dating someone over the internet was completely insane and illogical for the reasons people above have already stated. You can't actually see them unless they live close enough to you, you don't know if they're who they say they are, etc. And being the kind of person I am, that kind of stuff is important to me. I'm the really cuddly type of person and in an online relationship that is not likely to happen. HOWEVER, my mind has recently been changed about it. I'm kind of torn in between things at the moment. I have actually found someone on these forums who I would really want to date, but we're both skeptical about getting together since we live so far away from each other. Whether or not we will actually date are still up in the air lol. I agree with Britt that it really just depends on the people involved. There's my opinion lol.

[The King of KH]

Only Guys would say it doesn't work because they've never tried it. I haven't tried it but I know friends who make it work. It doesn't matter about the physical crap, because you have a real connection and waiting on the physical is a test of your true love. It's like abstinence, if you wait long enough it'll be special. If you blow it with every person you're with, you're simply a slut. If you use physical pleasure on a person that makes you the same. The fact that you can enjoy each others company without your tongue down their throat doesn't mean it's not love. Love is a feeling you can share with anyone. So before you say it's for the desperate, it's not really love, Shut It because you're not happy with your own lives and your own physical relationships. That's why they have online dating websites you Nerds.

Amen..

[cbchick]

Only Guys would say it doesn't work because they've never tried it. I haven't tried it but I know friends who make it work. It doesn't matter about the physical crap, because you have a real connection and waiting on the physical is a test of your true love. It's like abstinence, if you wait long enough it'll be special. If you blow it with every person you're with, you're simply a slut. If you use physical pleasure on a person that makes you the same. The fact that you can enjoy each others company without your tongue down their throat doesn't mean it's not love. Love is a feeling you can share with anyone. So before you say it's for the desperate, it's not really love, Shut It because you're not happy with your own lives and your own physical relationships. That's why they have online dating websites you Nerds.

exactly.

[Hopeless Heartless]

Only Guys would say it doesn't work because they've never tried it. I haven't tried it but I know friends who make it work. It doesn't matter about the physical crap, because you have a real connection and waiting on the physical is a test of your true love. It's like abstinence, if you wait long enough it'll be special. If you blow it with every person you're with, you're simply a slut. If you use physical pleasure on a person that makes you the same. The fact that you can enjoy each others company without your tongue down their throat doesn't mean it's not love. Love is a feeling you can share with anyone. So before you say it's for the desperate, it's not really love, Shut It because you're not happy with your own lives and your own physical relationships. That's why they have online dating websites you Nerds.



Nah mate, I'm sorry but I don't buy that for a damn minute. To love someone, I think you have to at least know what they ACTUALLY look like. No I'm not shallow, because it's like someone saying they love someone who's they find attractive but who have a rubbish personality. It's the exact opposite in this case. If they meet up after dating online for two years and it turns out that someone wasn't what someone was expecting, can you imagine how bad both parties would feel?Also, online personalities and actual personalities differ a whole lot. A person might be totally different on the webternet than IRL.

I've not once said that people who get in online relationships are desperate, my personal opinion is that if it makes you happy, go for it, I just don't see how they can work out in the long run.


Oh and don't go name calling and jumping to conclusions yeah? It's not nice for anyone involved.

[mysteryRoxas]

i was one time and it lasted for about 9 months. so most times, it does work.
but i still think it's better to be in an offline one >.> (my own reasons...)

[DragoonKain]

Nah mate, I'm sorry but I don't buy that for a damn minute. To love someone, I think you have to at least know what they ACTUALLY look like.

You've obviously never read a good book to realize that emotional attachment to non-existent humans is both possible and natural. Humans are naturally able to fall in love with both other humans, but also with imaginary ones and in some cases inanimate objects. In this case I am giving you the benefit of the doubt and calling an online girlfriend "imaginary". This is under full assumption that you don't know what she/he looks like.

I've not once said that people who get in online relationships are desperate, my personal opinion is that if it makes you happy, go for it, I just don't see how they can work out in the long run.


He was speaking to the person who did say it. (Scroll up.)

[Pink Ego Box]

I personally think that these sort of relationships will ONLY last if it's true love, which is quite the rarity. It's such a challenge to be faithful and dedicated when there's oceans and so much distance parting you. It's the ultimate love test though many fail it.

I've never been in a relationship. I'm so lonely! *slits*

[The Real keyblade Master]

i was one time and it lasted for about 9 months. so most times, it does work.
but i still think it's better to be in an offline one >.> (my own reasons...)

It only works because the individuals in the relationship have no one else and they pretty much want to feel "loved". They like being complimented.

[Pink Ego Box]

LOL.

It always comes down to personal character, though. It's such a broad subject. Can't really predict if it'll last, though I believe the chances'll be slim.

[The Real keyblade Master]

They'll get over it when they get older.

[Pink Ego Box]

They're supposed to, anyway.

[RXS]

I think they'll work, but they won't last for like, 40 years, you know?
You have to meet each other in person AT SOME POINT.

[The Real keyblade Master]

They're supposed to, anyway.

lmao..

[Wzrdto25]

No spamming please. This is a debate topic not a poll.

Also on the point of knowing what they look like, there's pictures for that. If people lie about their appearance then it's their own fault for not trusting their significant other. You can love people just by talking to them, fall in love with their personality, and eventually want to meet them yes. But the time you spend with them would be special. If you visit them every so often that would be like your sacred time together. But lot's of people go off to college and continue dating...people meet online and continue dating...it works for some people. For others they just give up and don't wait for the other person. It has to deal with what kind of person you are. So yeah..It works, but if you're not willing to put in the effort then no it won't work.

Personalities also don't change, if you act differently online than in real life then boo on you. It's still the same person talking no matter who you are, that personality came from you.

[RXS]

Yes i agree with that, but you cannot go your ENTIRE relationship without seeing/interacting physically with each other.

[Wzrdto25]

But online dating doesn't mean you don't ever get to see the person. It means the majority of the time you are dating you do it via the internet.

[cbchick]

its a matter of their decision. if they wanna online date then let them. its their choice.

[zeffie]

It's all a matter of commitment and dedication.. because two people that are honest and open, able to show each side of themselves when they communicate.. meaning the good, bad and the ugly.. will be able to experience a deeper trust and understanding for each other..

If you pretend, or cheat, or don't care then yes I would say it would not work.. however all such things can be done in person as well.. heck people put up a front while they date someone, get married and then do a complete 360 and act different after the fact.. so in person or online, sometimes you just never really know.. It's sad, but true.

Dating online has it's positives as well as negatives, but so does dating in person.. and I say that whatever works for you, go for it. I've experienced my share of both, and honestly it's really no different in a lot of ways.. Physical touch is a nice bonus, but not a requisite by a long shot.. Physical contact is not an argument for valid love. Because love should be unconditional.

[cbchick]

It's all a matter of commitment and dedication.. because two people that are honest and open, able to show each side of themselves when they communicate.. meaning the good, bad and the ugly.. will be able to experience a deeper trust and understanding for each other..

If you pretend, or cheat, or don't care then yes I would say it would not work.. however all such things can be done in person as well.. heck people put up a front while they date someone, get married and then do a complete 360 and act different after the fact.. so in person or online, sometimes you just never really know.. It's sad, but true.

Dating online has it's positives as well as negatives, but so does dating in person.. and I say that whatever works for you, go for it. I've experienced my share of both, and honestly it's really no different in a lot of ways.. Physical touch is a nice bonus, but not a requisite by a long shot.. Physical contact is not an argument for valid love. Because love should be unconditional.

agreed.

[Yellow Flash]

I agree with the person above be, it really depends on the person in question, and what they perfer. Though in my opinion, you really need to be with that person you are dating (pyshical)

[Miss Lockheart]

Lol I've had first hand experience of this- it was a guy in China, he seemed very sweet in his emails, and he did look like he did in the picture. Shame that when I went over to China to meet him, it turned out he was looking for an English wife :eek:

But of course that doesn't speak for every case, all are different. I think if you present yourself genuinely then it can work, just like any other relationship. In fact it takes away some of the initial awkwardness, if you concentrate on typing out your feelings instead of getting tongue-tied when you first meet a person. It can build up your confidence to an extent. Plus I always look worse in my pics than in real life so when someone meets me they at least don't have a glorified image of me, they can see all my flaws in the photo :P

I agree though that if it's to survive, there would have to be a meeting eventually. And if that goes well, then why not? And if it doesn't, then what have you really lost? Sure it can be disappointing, but at least you can just return to your ordinary life without it having too much impact. Unless you're the depressive type. I was a bit upset over my online relationship ending in disaster, but I can't say it's destroyed me. In fact it just made me want to meet more people and have fun, and not be so serious about life.

Perverts are worrying though. It's hard to spot one, since faking your identity online is just so easy. But if you want to have an online relationship, just be on your guard, whilst still letting enough of your real personality shine through ^^

[Yellow Flash]

Lol I've had first hand experience of this- it was a guy in China, he seemed very sweet in his emails, and he did look like he did in the picture. Shame that when I went over to China to meet him, it turned out he was looking for an English wife :eek:

But of course that doesn't speak for every case, all are different. I think if you present yourself genuinely then it can work, just like any other relationship. In fact it takes away some of the initial awkwardness, if you concentrate on typing out your feelings instead of getting tongue-tied when you first meet a person. It can build up your confidence to an extent. Plus I always look worse in my pics than in real life so when someone meets me they at least don't have a glorified image of me, they can see all my flaws in the photo :P

I agree though that if it's to survive, there would have to be a meeting eventually. And if that goes well, then why not? And if it doesn't, then what have you really lost? Sure it can be disappointing, but at least you can just return to your ordinary life without it having too much impact. Unless you're the depressive type. I was a bit upset over my online relationship ending in disaster, but I can't say it's destroyed me. In fact it just made me want to meet more people and have fun, and not be so serious about life.

Perverts are worrying though. It's hard to spot one, since faking your identity online is just so easy. But if you want to have an online relationship, just be on your guard, whilst still letting enough of your real personality shine through ^^

yeah i agree with this logic.....but the problem with online dating, is that you always want to be on the computer talking to your girl/boy firend, and you don't really have time for your other life.....or visa versa, not having enough time for you girl/boyfriend.....And if you spend to much time on the computer it can be unhealthy (but who am I to talk....lol)

[The King of KH]

It's all a matter of commitment and dedication.. because two people that are honest and open, able to show each side of themselves when they communicate.. meaning the good, bad and the ugly.. will be able to experience a deeper trust and understanding for each other..

If you pretend, or cheat, or don't care then yes I would say it would not work.. however all such things can be done in person as well.. heck people put up a front while they date someone, get married and then do a complete 360 and act different after the fact.. so in person or online, sometimes you just never really know.. It's sad, but true.

Dating online has it's positives as well as negatives, but so does dating in person.. and I say that whatever works for you, go for it. I've experienced my share of both, and honestly it's really no different in a lot of ways.. Physical touch is a nice bonus, but not a requisite by a long shot.. Physical contact is not an argument for valid love. Because love should be unconditional.
Nice point. I agree with this.....

[dahomieak]

i dont think you could be in love online, but you could be in a relationship by talkin, even if you're not going out

[Kryptik]

Here's the "Relationship Issues" (http://www.kingdomhearts3.org/showthread.php?t=19098) Thread and the "Relationship Problems/Advice" (http://www.kingdomhearts3.org/showthread.php?t=13548&page=23) Section if you need that. Just a reference though.. ^^
Just showing how much relationships work and worked in the past....xD...

OOh and lets not forget Naminette's thread...
*rips out hair* (http://www.kingdomhearts3.org/showthread.php?t=19529)

Then ask yourself again about how online and realistic relationships work.

[Hopeless Heartless]

See I just don't get it. It just really doesn't make sense to me how someone can be in love with someone they've never met, and I doubt I'm the only one who thinks it. I know love is unconditional, I accept that, but for me, cuddling with your girl seems a lot more appealing to me than thinking about it. For me, theres's nothing better than holding hands with a girl you like and looking into their eyes and totally absorbing the experience. An online relationship just seems a bit...clinical to me.


But then again, I am wholeheartedly for those who have online relationships and are extremely happy with it. All the power to you, but I doubt I could ever fall in love with someone via a social networking site or a forum.


(Bet you I meet the love of my life next time I'm on Myspace :D)

[Wzrdto25]

It's cause you don't have to know someone's face or what they look like to fall in love. Even in real life you shouldn't love someone because they look like a movie star, if you don't click with someone personality wise then your whole relationship is based off of superficial aspects and you need to rethink that. If people, like you need that whole touchy feeling aspect then you shouldn't date online. Like Zeffie and I pointed out, it depends on who you are, but yes it works for some.

It's just if someone has the patience to be with someone over the internet it doesn't make them "Desperate" or "Afraid to have a real one" because to them they really unconditionally have feelings for that person. But it's just the kind of relationship they can't help. They fall in love with someone miles away, and they have no other way of being with someone.

[Hopeless Heartless]

As I said in previous posts, I do not base the idea of falling in love on looks soley at all. To say you don't need to know what someone looks like is a bit farfetched however. Because no matter how good their personality may appear to be, no matter how much you click with them, you still, at the end of the day, cannot actually trust them that what they're saying is the truth. It's a bit of a scary thought that someone can confess love to someone a million miles away and not know what they look like. Some people lie and that about their appearence because they are afraid their online-partner will reject them, but really, if they are in love as they say they are, what they look like shouldn't matter much to either party, and that sounds like I've just contradicted myself, but read on.

I'm just saying, sometimes, things aren't as innocent as they seem, and I know it's a cynical thought but there are indeed sick people out there. The whole thing is just a bit unsettling to me.

Can you see what I'm going on about?


Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not some shallow jerk who will only get with the hottest girls, or the ones with the biggest boobs or crap like that. If a girl makes an effort to talk to me, get to know me and make me laugh, she's already a winner to me :) I just think I'd rather know what I'm getting myself into then not knowing at all, no matter how good a person they seem via the internet.


(I think mainly I'm speaking from a girls POV about the whole sick thing. They get far more pervs after them then guys like aha)

[Wzrdto25]

I said..some people need touchy feeling love.

[cbchick]

i think most people understand that their are some sick people out there and people who lie and stuff. i think we all kno about that but some people still online date even if they kno the consequences. they take their chances. its jus depends on the person themselves.

[Lone Wolf]

My true honest opinion is no.

There is a feel of uncertainty lingering every moment. I personally feel that you can read the words "I love you" but you won't ever feel it. You can meet your match online, but people tend to show what they want to show.

I've known people who've had a relationship off and online. To them it felt relatively easy to keep the online reltaionship. It was sickening just hearing about it.

Theres also that problem with identity. You wont know who that person really is till you meet them. Theres also the chance that you might meet a sexual predator. Its possible.

There are too many negative factors that outbalance the positive ones, so in conclusion I'd say it woulnd't be a good idea. Although like all rules and laws there are exceptions.

[The King of KH]

I dont think Desperate has to deal with anything. Like some statted above me, it depends on the person. Some people might think it doesnt work, some might. Its just all opinions.......

[The Real keyblade Master]

I dont think Desperate has to deal with anything. Like some statted above me, it depends on the person. Some people might think it doesnt work, some might. Its just all opinions.......

Maybe being depressed isnt always the case but in other cases the parents don't want their child to date or religion or custums might have something to do with it. And because the individual can't date socially, they "date" online (even though i don't see how you can even date online).

[Miss Lockheart]

I said..some people need touchy feeling love.

Yeah we all need touchy feely love sometimes :P

But it can be dangerous, I have to admit. That's why it's nice if you can meet that person in RL, so you can know if they are genuine or not. And if they aren't, have some sort of weapon ready >.>

If you have the strength of mind and character, then online dating can be really rewarding. It can be hard to be vigilant, but if you've been talking to someone for a long long time then that's ok in my book.

[Juji Kabane]

Real life is better, but its alot of work with online relationships.

[The King of KH]

Real life is better, but its alot of work with online relationships.

Not really Mr. R.Kelly.........

Like i said before, it depends on the muslim...

[Kairi]

Hey all (Mod's if there is already a topic like this, feel free to lock it. It's just I searched "Online" and got 975 pages of results. Not nice :P)


I was wondering how you guys felt about internet relationships. This topic has been on my mind for quite sometime, so I thought "I may as well see what other people have to say."


Myself, personally, I don't believe in them. I think you really have to meet someone special to get into a relationship, and not via a computer screen. I mean, you'd never know what the person actually looked like (pictures can only show too much), you could never hold them, or play with their hair, anything like that. The whole thing seems a bit sterile to me, that's all.


I'm not knocking those who are involved in them though, I just don't really see the point in them, that's all.


I VALUE YOUR OPINIONS :)
So spill!
'Do they work?' Hmm, an interesting question.

Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't... or at least, it's very hard to make them work. Then you have to think--is it REALLY worth it? I know people that have met on websites like Facebook, developed long-term relationships and have actually fallen in love.

I do believe that two people can fall in love, since I have seen it with my own eyes. Julieta and Andy have been together for three years, but they meet up in real life too. (They live in different countries). Love is love at the end of the day. It can happen anywhere, at any time, but you just have to know what you're doing and be responsible about it. Not everybody on the internet is who they say they are; it's so easy posting a pic that isn't of you and pretending it is. The naive kids don't understand that. You need to know the difference between right and wrong--not many do, so they engage in the seedy stuff. Now that is a sign of desperation when they're describing sex acts to each other, in my opinion. Or stripping and *cough* "☠☠☠☠☠☠☠" using webcams.

For me, any kind of relationship is more physical than it is communicating. That's why I've never bothered about making friends online, because I don't really see the point in them. But, there are a couple of exceptions, and there's a handful of people out there for me. I am myself with those guys. With everybody else, I feel a little uncomfortable, but I get on with it and pretend it doesn't make me feel like that.

Personalities also don't change.
Not necessarily. The way I am online is totally different than how I am in real life. My personality is very different. Most people think I'm just quiet, but the fact is, I feel uncomfortable sometimes. Especially when they're like, "ZOMG DOOD AM RANDUMB AN CRAP XDD" Even though I have known some of you for a long, long time, I wouldn't say that I trust all of you. That's why I never go on stuff like MSN, because that means I HAVE to talk to you. That makes me sound anti-social, but I guess I am on the internet. :P I'm just paranoid to the extreme.

[Sora-Keyblade]

Online Relationships never work unless the "online couple" live in the same city or maybe the same country.. But realllly long-distance relationships dont work unless they dont have parents to stop them. :P

[Naminé1982]

I found my fiance on my friend's myspace page. He was in her top friends list and I was IMing her and said, "Whoa! Who's this James person?" and she introduced us over IM and we talked for hours and ended up meeting soon after.
It wasn't technically an online dating thing, but as far as Match.com and stuff, I think some people just don't try hard enough lol.
I mean, someone has to know someone else to hook you up with and if not, go out and meet people. Don't go to a bar though, most people are only looking for one nighters.
Try doing something you love. If I Hadn't met James I may have gone to some Kingdom Hearts convention lol
But I agree, they tend to not work in my opinion. Most people I see on those sites for my area are NOT my type so I don't see how they'd figure they were. Odd.
:confused:

[Shadow of Light]

If your going to have a online relationship... Don't be stupid with it...

[Phantom]

Can they work...hmmmmm. My short answer is yes.

I believe they can work if both people are mature enough to handle it. Which means adult-like maturity. A 3-month cyber session is doomed from the start lol.

Though, it's still risky even if both parties are mature. People can take on uber-personalities online, while in rl they can't lol. The key would be lots of phone communication. That gives you a slightly better idea of the person. Though, people can still act "better" on the phone. I personally prefer in person. But yes, I believe it is "possible" to have a successful online relationship.

[The King of KH]

I think they do work......

unless the boy lives in africa and the other girl lives in Venezuela.....

[cbchick]

'Do they work?' Hmm, an interesting question.

Sometimes they do and sometimes they don't... or at least, it's very hard to make them work. Then you have to think--is it REALLY worth it? I know people that have met on websites like Facebook, developed long-term relationships and have actually fallen in love.

I do believe that two people can fall in love, since I have seen it with my own eyes. Julieta and Andy have been together for three years, but they meet up in real life too. (They live in different countries). Love is love at the end of the day. It can happen anywhere, at any time, but you just have to know what you're doing and be responsible about it. Not everybody on the internet is who they say they are; it's so easy posting a pic that isn't of you and pretending it is. The naive kids don't understand that. You need to know the difference between right and wrong--not many do, so they engage in the seedy stuff. Now that is a sign of desperation when they're describing sex acts to each other, in my opinion. Or stripping and *cough* "☠☠☠☠☠☠☠" using webcams.

For me, any kind of relationship is more physical than it is communicating. That's why I've never bothered about making friends online, because I don't really see the point in them. But, there are a couple of exceptions, and there's a handful of people out there for me. I am myself with those guys. With everybody else, I feel a little uncomfortable, but I get on with it and pretend it doesn't make me feel like that.


i agree with you. if you're going to have an online relationship, you have to be mature about it, and to be safe and kno what you're doing. They can work but you have to be able to handle it. Yes love is love at the end of the day. it doesn't matter where it happens, it jus does.


Can they work...hmmmmm. My short answer is yes.

I believe they can work if both people are mature enough to handle it. Which means adult-like maturity. A 3-month cyber session is doomed from the start lol.

Though, it's still risky even if both parties are mature. People can take on uber-personalities online, while in rl they can't lol. The key would be lots of phone communication. That gives you a slightly better idea of the person. Though, people can still act "better" on the phone. I personally prefer in person. But yes, I believe it is "possible" to have a successful online relationship.

Again, i agree with you too lol
like..if you add the cybering and stuff, that's like waaay too much ya kno. It should only matter about the trust that you share and the communication in the relationship. Online relationships are different for everyone. Most people have to be mature about it and kno what they're doing. They'll be many obstacles and things but you have to get through them.

[Phantom]

Again, i agree with you too lol
like..if you add the cybering and stuff, that's like waaay too much ya kno. It should only matter about the trust that you share and the communication in the relationship. Online relationships are different for everyone. Most people have to be mature about it and kno what they're doing. They'll be many obstacles and things but you have to get through them.

I'm not saying cybering is "bad". But it has to be based upon love. Not hornyness lol (at least, not entirely). I mean honestly, don't most people have sex anyway? In my opinion, it's "less" than sex. Kind of risky though, ya' know?

edit in: It might even be good for the relationship if handled correctly.

[cbchick]

I'm not saying cybering is "bad". But it has to be based upon love. Not hornyness lol (at least, not entirely). I mean honestly, don't most people have sex anyway? In my opinion, it's "less" than sex. Kind of risky though, ya' know?

yea i get ya lol

[Sora The Hero]

nope.

[Skye Wielder of Heaven]

Skye says: Hells yea.

[Chrono Mizaki]

I agree

It's all compliments and saying "I love you". But there is no "Love" because sometimes one or both of the people in the relationship have never experienced a relationship before.

It's a idea for the desperate.

I disagree... Yes, there are some people who look on the internet for 'someone'. But maybe that's because they are desperate to find the right person. I'm not bringing in stuff such as 'I want a BF/GF' topics.

Because let's face, I won't even call it that a relationship. It's pointless, harmless, sad fun.

Now I'll be honest... I'm currently in a online relationship. But I've been friends with her for about two years, and we admitted our feelings to each other last year in May. We didn't choose to 'fall' in love, but it does happen.

It happens everywhere... Let's face it, Internet is just another place. As long as you have safety, seeing a regular picture of them, see them on webcam at least a couple of time and 'know' them well. Then it can work...

BF/GF topics will not work .

[cbchick]

I disagree... Yes, there are some people who look on the internet for 'someone'. But maybe that's because they are desperate to find the right person. I'm not bringing in stuff such as 'I want a BF/GF' topics.

Because let's face, I won't even call it that a relationship. It's pointless, harmless, sad fun.

Now I'll be honest... I'm currently in a online relationship. But I've been friends with her for about two years, and we admitted our feelings to each other last year in May. We didn't choose to 'fall' in love, but it does happen.

It happens everywhere... Let's face it, Internet is just another place. As long as you have safety, seeing a regular picture of them, see them on webcam at least a couple of time and 'know' them well. Then it can work...

BF/GF topics will not work .

agreed.

love can happen anywhere.

[Firesnake]

In some cases they can but I'm an eternal sceptic so I dunno
Love works in a strange way
and who am I to doubt?

[Lone Wolf]

Same case here.

I gave it a try once, but it didn't feel right.

Yeah, sure love works in mysterious ways, but the technology to turn love into electric particles won't exist ever.

[Phantom]

The ones I've had 'worked'. The only reason they ended were because of religious issues (I bet Lone Wolf and Yellow Flash are laughing right now lol). But I truly loved them. I probably would've married the second one actually.

[Yellow Flash]

lol.......wow, well I guess it works for some people.......

[Lone Wolf]

The ones I've had 'worked'. The only reason they ended were because of religious issues (I bet Lone Wolf and Yellow Flash are laughing right now lol). But I truly loved them. I probably would've married the second one actually.
It sounds ironic enoguh to laugh at, I can tell you that much.

[Phantom]

It sounds ironic enoguh to laugh at, I can tell you that much.

At that time, I was a STRONG evangelical, bordering on fundamental. The first one I broke up with because she read Harry Potter =/. Ha! If only I could've seen where I would go in 2 years lol. Now I AM Harry Potter :D.

[Yellow Flash]

At that time, I was a STRONG evangelical, bordering on fundamental. The first one I broke up with because she read Harry Potter =/. Ha! If only I could've seen where I would go in 2 years lol. Now I AM Harry Potter :D.

I read Harry Potter...........and I think it is ok (as long as you relise it is only fiction....)

[Sora]

No spam plz.

[FlurryOfDancingFlames~]

I think that an online relationship can work, just so long as it isn't classed as love, because even though I think love is blind, I don't think it can work without physical presence. They're a difficult thing to figure out, because some people are capable of expressing their true personality online, some aren't, and personality is very important.

[Nobodies Heartless]

what are peoples opinions on this?

I have always had friends online. But recently I became attracted to one of them. They have said they are aslo interested in me. I am not sure about the whole dating online thing. I mean we live a world away. Can that work? Can I be sure she isn't an 80 year old man?

xo
Jess

[xaldin's_my_nobody]

you can never be sure, but the thing is that online relationships aren't really there, cause you never actually met the person and that can't work if you talk to each other with a wall of internet and avi's

So I say ney

[cbchick]

it depends. some of them work, and some of them don't.

[Mathew]

It's hard to say, really.

I can tell you from experience, it's MUCH different compared to a physical relationship. If you do wind up getting in a relationship with this person, take care to note that though it may not seem that way, relationships are much harder to maintain without physical interaction.

You're going to have to express everything you feel through words. This is related to orality in a way, and it's MUCH different than a normal relationship.

Remember, you're going to have to find a way to enjoy the time you are together; whether it be through a game or simple conversation.

Look at it this way - say you both are bored. You've no games to play, nothing to talk about at the moment. You won't be able to just go to this person's house and hang out with them, or go out somewhere. You'll need to rely on things you can do together. If it happens too often where you both are bored and never find anything to do, one of you will start doing other things, be it leaving to hang out with some personal friends - and the other person may get the wrong implication from this.

All I'm saying is that it's much harder than a normal relationship, but they can be enjoyable. Give it a shot, and make sure to discuss before-hand what will happen if it doesn't work out. You don't want it to end in a week and be on bad terms, do ya?

small tip, make silly promises, she'll remember them and it will keep things together (say you'll come home from school right away to talk to her, small things like this);)

[Yellow Flash]

Yeah I would argee with Matt on this one.........but then again how far away is he?
State?
Country?
Conitnate?

[cbchick]

It's hard to say, really.

I can tell you from experience, it's MUCH different compared to a physical relationship. If you do wind up getting in a relationship with this person, take care to note that though it may not seem that way, relationships are much harder to maintain without physical interaction.

You're going to have to express everything you feel through words. This is related to orality in a way, and it's MUCH different than a normal relationship.

Remember, you're going to have to find a way to enjoy the time you are together; whether it be through a game or simple conversation.

Look at it this way - say you both are bored. You've no games to play, nothing to talk about at the moment. You won't be able to just go to this person's house and hang out with them, or go out somewhere. You'll need to rely on things you can do together. If it happens too often where you both are bored and never find anything to do, one of you will start doing other things, be it leaving to hang out with some personal friends - and the other person may get the wrong implication from this.

All I'm saying is that it's much harder than a normal relationship, but they can be enjoyable. Give it a shot, and make sure to discuss before-hand what will happen if it doesn't work out. You don't want it to end in a week and be on bad terms, do ya?

small tip, make silly promises, she'll remember them and it will keep things together (say you'll come home from school right away to talk to her, small things like this);)

exactly what he said.

[Sora-Keyblade]

what are peoples opinions on this?

I have always had friends online. But recently I became attracted to one of them. They have said they are aslo interested in me. I am not sure about the whole dating online thing. I mean we live a world away. Can that work? Can I be sure she isn't an 80 year old man?

xo
Jess

Online dating is just horrible. Why have a date on the internet when you could just go outside and find one? You should always know that the guy/girl you're dating might not be who you think he/she is. There are a lot of pedophiles in the internet, after all.

[Yellow Flash]

You also have a point...........a very good one

[Jess]

A lot of opinions on online dating can be found in this thread:
http://www.kingdomhearts3.org/showthread.php?t=19479

I personally think they can work.

[Sora-Keyblade]

Did I mention that some people start out on the internet with fake personality/appearance? There's a lot of them, too.

[Yellow Flash]

Yes you do have a point........though it does say pictures don't lie........although

[Miss Lockheart]

They do when someone steals your pics and passes themselves off as you >.> I saw that on another FF forum someone had taken someone else's identity, their pics and everything. It was freaky *_*

It's nice if you can meet that person for real though, just makes it all the more genuine and nice ^^

[Yellow Flash]

It could be possiable for me and Skye......cause she just lives a state away.....the only problem in this plan.......
I'm 15.............

[Miss Lockheart]

Yes I think age is a big factor, and also how your parents treat you at each age. Some kids are allowed to do as they please at 15, some are still being smothered at 18, it totally depends on the situation. It's also helpful to remember that you can be a victim of fraud (or get mugged on the way to meeting someone >.<) at any age, so you have to be so careful.

Lol now that I think about it, going to China and Holland alone were pretty crazy ideas, since anything could have happened to me. But I don't regret them, I'm always really proud that I managed to be careful and travel savvy and meet the people I wanted to meet without much trouble- no trouble at all in Holland :D

But yeah whatever you do you just have to be really cautious, not just over who you meet, but where you go to meet them and safe travel etc ^^

[Yellow Flash]

Yes I get what you are saying........and if I think of it.....there is no way, that I would be allowed to go to Melbounre alone, to see someone I have never met in real life. (No offence......)

And you are right......but your fine, and I'm sure you could handle yourself in a fight

[Miss Lockheart]

Hahahaha I jumped when a Dutch guy asked me for money in English, I probably would have freaked out and curled up in a corner if he'd attacked me :P

But I digress. I think it would be nice if you could meet her someday, just be careful and plan well :)

[Yellow Flash]

Yes it would be nice.......and I will be careful and plan well............but I think my cuz might of known her.....he used to live in Melborne.........

[KHlover07]

Personally, I think an online relationship can definitely work if you can actually make the effort to meet in real life eventually. It's just something that you have to be willing to commit to. If both of you can't then it won't work. I've known quite a few people on here that have or are online dating someone. I've even actually been in the situation where I've actually wanted to date someone from the forums and I still do lol. Anyways, if you guys can make an effort then I don't see why it couldn't work. Just keep in mind that what everyone has said so far is true. People on the internet can be creepy pedophiles. I would make sure that you completely trust this person first before you take things to the next level.

[Sora-Keyblade]

Personally, I think an online relationship can definitely work if you can actually make the effort to meet in real life eventually. It's just something that you have to be willing to commit to. If both of you can't then it won't work. I've known quite a few people on here that have or are online dating someone. I've even actually been in the situation where I've actually wanted to date someone from the forums and I still do lol. Anyways, if you guys can make an effort then I don't see why it couldn't work. Just keep in mind that what everyone has said so far is true. People on the internet can be creepy pedophiles. I would make sure that you completely trust this person first before you take things to the next level.

And how many of them have actually met in real life?

[Chrono Mizaki]

And how many of them have actually met in real life?

I can name a few people... Plus I read women magazines such as reveal and such with real life stories. Some of them been traumatised and some feel it's the best thing they did. Online Dating is a double-edge sword... It's just whether you can handle it maturely or not.

Online dating is just horrible. Why have a date on the internet when you could just go outside and find one? You should always know that the guy/girl you're dating might not be who you think he/she is. There are a lot of pedophiles in the internet, after all.

Come here, Rob...

*hits your head with a hammer*

Now that I got that out of my system, let me explain something to you. NO ONE CANNOT CONTROL HOW YOU FEEL. Trust me, plus you don't know.... you can find some right moron in your area that aren't worth dating.

Plus you can never get attacked by a peado if you have enough safety and such. I mean, webcams exist for a reason. And it's not like you're going to randomly meet this person you like for... let's say a week.

And oh, let's get this out on the table...

I'm in a online relationship with a girl I known on a forum for TWO YEARS And I admitted my feelings to her in May 2007, in which she feels the same about me. And in August - September 2008, we're still going strong. We're ain't bored of each other, we still love each other very much and we're trying the best we can to meet each other.

So yes, it can work with dedication, maturity, safety on the internet, etc.

People who say that people date online because they can't get one in real life is total bull. I've dated two girls in rl and I wish I haven't. Who I'm with online is probably one of the greatest things I can have.

So yes... it can work. Just beware what you're getting into.

[Sora-Keyblade]

I'm in a online relationship with a girl I known on a forum for TWO YEARS And I admitted my feelings to her in May 2007, in which she feels the same about me. And in August - September 2008, we're still going strong. We're ain't bored of each other, we still love each other very much and we're trying the best we can to meet each other.


And in these two years, did you guys ever meet? You could get hurt in the end. Funny how most of the protesters for online dating actually have a date online.

[Miss Lockheart]

Sorry if this is confusing, but I've done a merger with the closed thread in Personal Forum so that all those opinions can be counted here.

[Chrono Mizaki]

And in these two years, did you guys ever meet? You could get hurt in the end. Funny how most of the protesters for online dating actually have a date online.

Nope, but we're planning to meet in October. In a anime expo...

Yes, people can get hurt, but who said you won't. It's just a risk you have to take. All relationship in the end is built on risk

Whether it's for good or bad.

[Sora-Keyblade]

Nope, but we're planning to meet in October. In a anime expo...

Yes, people can get hurt, but who said you won't. It's just a risk you have to take. All relationship in the end is built on risk

Whether it's for good or bad.

Online relationships just have a less possibility to succeed rather than real ones. Therefore, it would most likely fail and you'll get hurt. Real ones don't intend to fail much.

[Jess]

Online relationships just have a less possibility to succeed rather than real ones. Therefore, it would most likely fail and you'll get hurt. Real ones don't intend to fail much.

You have this horribly negative view. :\

I'd love to see the proof you have of "real" relationships working better than online ones.

[Sora-Keyblade]

You have this horribly negative view. :\

I'd love to see the proof you have of "real" relationships working better than online ones.
I don't have any proofs.

It's just that online relationships could fail when the couple finally meet together. That is IF they meet together. While real relationships don't need the hassle of meeting. I know that real relationships aren't really successful but.. they have a higher possibility.

[Jess]

I don't have any proofs.

It's just that online relationships could fail when the couple finally meet together. That is IF they meet together. While real relationships don't need the hassle of meeting. I know that real relationships aren't really successful but.. they have a higher possibility.

Yes, meeting somebody can be awkward. But there are some "real" relationships where people are awkward when with each other, but when they text or IM one another they can write down all this deep and meaningful stuff. I think that both "real" relationships and online relationships have their downfalls, and I think that an online relationship will work if you don't expect it to work.

I understand your point, and it is probably valid to some extent and in some situations, but I think it's a complete generalization.

[Miss Lockheart]

There's a lot to be said for meeting someone, although it can still work even if you don't....

[cbchick]

i think both "real" and online relationships can work. yea an online relationship could be hard at times but if you really put an effort in it, i think you can make it work.

[Sora-Keyblade]

Yes, meeting somebody can be awkward. But there are some "real" relationships where people are awkward when with each other, but when they text or IM one another they can write down all this deep and meaningful stuff. I think that both "real" relationships and online relationships have their downfalls, and I think that an online relationship will work if you don't expect it to work.

I understand your point, and it is probably valid to some extent and in some situations, but I think it's a complete generalization.

That's exactly what Kain said.


If you're entering an online relationship looking for something more along the lines of a companion, you might not be in all that much trouble. I for one, at times, have trouble expressing myself in a physical relationship. Online relationships I find... are just easier. I don't communicate well with somebody in person, but online I'm more comfortable.

No need to repeat it twice but I can't argue with that. It DOES make you feel more comfortable... But what happens when the time comes and the couple finally meet? You HAVE to face that situation.

[shadowlink]

Online and real life relationships both have their ups and downs. I find in an online relationship things are more relaxed and easier to control. I mean i was in an internet based relationship as i went through my GCSE exams, and it helped out. I could concentrate more (Not enough though ^__^;) on revising rather than going to see my girlfriend. But generally i find real life relationships to be more intimate and people grow more towards each other than an online relationship can. I mean like a lot of people say, you can't fall in love with someone you've never met. In a lot of cases this is true, but others it isn't.

One thing i'm not too keen on though, is how a lot of people act far differently in real life than they do on msn. So really is the person you've supposedly fallen in love with or really like the person they actually are? And no, i'm not saying they're paedos -.- Anyone stupid enough to realise that a teenage girl is actually a 40 year old paedophile is well.. stupid XD.

Imo, real life relationships are better, but online ones can work, and some work just as well.

[Jess]

That's exactly what Kain said.



No need to repeat it twice but I can't argue with that. It DOES make you feel more comfortable... But what happens when the time comes and the couple finally meet? You HAVE to face that situation.

(that kind of made me laugh, I hadn't actually read that -_-)

When the couple do face that situation, then yes, it could be awkward, it could cause the relationship to end, and I'm sure there are lots more negative aspects of it. But there could also be positive ones. And perhaps optimism is the only way to face the situation, in my opinion. It's hard to turn an online relationship into something physical but it can happen.

[Sora-Keyblade]

(that kind of made me laugh, I hadn't actually read that -_-)

I did. :P

To me, online relationships just don't work often. Better off start a real one.

[cbchick]

Online and real life relationships both have their ups and downs. I find in an online relationship things are more relaxed and easier to control. I mean i was in an internet based relationship as i went through my GCSE exams, and it helped out. I could concentrate more (Not enough though ^__^;) on revising rather than going to see my girlfriend. But generally i find real life relationships to be more intimate and people grow more towards each other than an online relationship can. I mean like a lot of people say, you can't fall in love with someone you've never met. In a lot of cases this is true, but others it isn't.

One thing i'm not too keen on though, is how a lot of people act far differently in real life than they do on msn. So really is the person you've supposedly fallen in love with or really like the person they actually are? And no, i'm not saying they're paedos -.- Anyone stupid enough to realise that a teenage girl is actually a 40 year old paedophile is well.. stupid XD.

Imo, real life relationships are better, but online ones can work, and some work just as well.

that cracked me up lmao XD